This is NOT that post...

Everyone does the “Resolutions” post about the things they “believe” they’re really going to accomplish in the coming year.

This is NOT that post.

Even though everyone INTENDS to keep their resolutions, by the 2nd week of the new year, 90% of those resolutions have been tossed by the wayside and forgotten. A dieter gets one whiff of a cheeseburger and the resolution to lose weight and eat healthier is thrown out the drive thru window. (And no, I’m not speaking from personal experience! Why would you even think that???)

There are a lot of good intentions in this world but as you’ve heard before “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” And I don’t want to go to hell. Really… It’s hot there… I’m just sayin…

I may have mentioned this before but I am the biggest procrastinator you will EVER have the chance of knowing. I admit that. I accept that.

“My name is Andrea and I’m a procrastinator.”

<“Hi Andrea!”>

So I figured that since I’m a rebel and thrive on being the Fruit Loop in this big old world full of Cheerios, I am doing a different post.

My list of things I WILL NOT resolve to do this year!

1. I will not promise to keep my house cleaner then it has been for the past 5 years. Will I remember 5 years from now if my sink was shiny every morning and my bed made? NO! What I will remember is the memories I will make with my son and with Jason. They are more important to me then making sure all my couch pillows are exactly straight in case company comes over.
   

I will not promise to lose weight! Dieting is for the birds. I would rather focus my energy on life and living it! If I died tomorrow would I be glad I had a salad last night for dinner? Or a grapefruit for breakfast? No! (Plus, I love food too much to give any of it up. Shh, that’ll be our little secret!) I have NEVER been one of those girls who doesn’t eat on dates and stresses over her body every second of every day. I do NOT have a scale in my house and will never own one. And I like chocolate cake. A lot. Seriously.

I will not resolve to quit drinking. Why would I do that? It's a good time. Besides, if I quit drinking, what would I do between 9 and 10:00 in the morning at work?


I will not resolve to get out of debt. I can't wrap my head around that and as I've said already, when you're a procastinator, getting out of debt isn't something you know you can handle. And how would I get out of debt with all the retail therapy I need to accomplish?

I will not resolve to get my "professional life" in order or wish for a better career. I don't want to work. Have never wanted to work. I DREAD going to work. Why would I resolve to get more of it in my life?
I will not resolve to have more peace and quiet in my life. I've never shared this with all of you before BUT I have a confession to make. (Yes, I know! Another one! It feels great to get all these confessions off my chest!) I am the "shusher" mom. The one who yells at everyone else to shut up because I can't take a lot of noise. J and Brady will be rough housing and playing at night and I'm constantly telling them to shut their pie holes. I need to stop that.



I will not resolve to take on a new hobby or learn a new language. I already have more then I have time for. Besides, what could be a better hobby then bedazzling everything we own.

So, those are my UN-Resolutions for 2009!