Oh Ya, the Cat's in Heat Too!

"Craptastic life, party of one, your table is ready!"

Ya, that would be me. Well, officially the last couple of months sucked pretty hard but who's counting right? I'd like to share just the last few weeks with you so here we go...

Should we do it by bullet point? I think this much heinousness deserves some bullet points for effect...

• B broke his wrist. Jumping off the swingset in our backyard. To be fair, he didn't do it while pretending to be Superman or Flash or whatever superhero crap is big these days (which I would know nothing about because I try to ignore as much of that as possible being the only girl in the house. It's bad enough half the time the toilet seat is left up. A girl can get a rude awakening in the middle of the night. Just sayin'!) There was 20 little kids in the backyard since they all congregate at our house, his friend was pushing him too high, he was yelling "stop!" and the kid said he didn't hear him with all the noise with the other kids, so B jumped off. Snapped one of the bones in his wrist.
  
• For some reason the ER where we took him the night he broke his wrist put a splint on him and asked us to come back in 3 days for a cast. There. To the ER.
  

Now if you have never really broken a bone in your life, like me, you would take this advice at face value. When a doctor who seems to know what he's talking about, tells you what to do, you do it right? Sounded reasonable. I didn't know any better. (Plus his name was Dr. Heck (no joke) and he was very handsome. Handsome doctors *always* know what they're talking about right? Just watch Greys Anatomy! Having the ER put on the cast was a huge FAIL. Poor B suffered through having the cast on for almost 2 1/2 weeks when I found out something a little strange...

I had picked him up from my mom & I said to him (from the front seat where I was driving) "Little dude, I can smell the stink from your rotting skin under your cast all the way from the back seat!" To which my smart, intelligent son says (from the backseat) "It can't smell that bad gorgeous, beautiful mother o' mine! I took the cast off today and washed my skin!" Well, ok, he didn't say the "gorgeous" part but you get the gist. Here's me doing a double take in the rear view mirror! "Wha...? Huh? What do you mean you took OFF your cast???" My son explains that he could take the cast completely off and had been able to since it was PUT ON. Ya, oops. Guess the ER didn't know what they were doing. Since B has never had a cast, and we fail as parents, no one really explained to the poor kid, ya, you probably shouldn't be able to do that.

• We took B in to an actual Ortho Specialist/Surgeon last week as soon as I realized he had on a faux cast. Loved the new office/doc who we were referred to, B was happy because he got to choose a red cast (the last one was white since that's all the ER carries), and all was fine right? Wrong! That very afternoon when we picked B up from school, B once again tells us that this 2nd cast ALSO comes off. This one is more loose then the first one. Yes, he's now on his THIRD cast. Not only that but he has to be in the cast again for ANOTHER 3+ weeks to see if he's healed yet since the last one did not give him proper support. Ya, he's thrilled about that. You shoulda seen the poor kids face...
  
• Over the past 2 weeks we've had to replace 6 tires between my car and our truck. To the tune of $850! Want to know how many purses I could buy with $850?? (Shuddup... We all have our own addictions. Some people drink. Ok, I drink too but I get my rocks off on the all the pretty purses I can find!)
  
• Someone took offense to my post I'd written on Iowa's ruling to allow same sex marriages. (No, it was not someone gay. Had nothing to do with that). Someone felt I poked fun at their expense, was very upset about it, and I've now been forbidden from talking about them anymore online. FORBIDDEN! This includes my blog, Twitter, and Facebook. I didn't see what the big deal was, and felt this person blew it all out of proportion but their feelings are their feelings. Now, you guys know I never do what I'm told and when someone tells me I HAVE TO do something, I always do the opposite right? But this time, since I care about them, I will respect their wishes. I won't like it, but I'll do it. pfftttt

There is actually more that happened, like, oh I don't know, the fact that I'm stuck on my couch with my back locked up, and something happened at work yesterday that involved my boss finding me on the floor breathing in to a paper sack. But I'll leave that for another day.

Whew! I feel much better that I've unloaded on all of you. I know it's been a long time since I've posted and I've missed it. Someone has to tell me their month has been worse then mine! Come on.. Spill it.... Make me feel better!